January 30, 2014

Who inspired today's broken heart song?

A woman who partied hard when she was in her twenties. She drank heavily, self-medicated and then got pregnant. She assumed the father was her recent ex who had been cheating on her, so they tried to make it work and got engaged. Three years later, he discovered he wasn't the biological father, and left. The woman was ashamed and hated herself for two years after that. She couldn't forgive herself. She is now happily married and a proud mother.

Cry is a song written from the perspective of a mother to her daughter. She talks about the mistakes she made in the past, but has no regrets because she now has the best thing in her life, her daughter. She talks about keeping a negative man in her life. She reassures her daughter that she will never have to go through that because she will always have her mother by her side. This is honestly one of my favorite songs I've written on this journey so far. I got really emotional singing it today. I have so much respect for a mother's love for her child.

Where did you play?

I played at 59th Street – Columbus Circle. I kind of freaked out when I got there. It was by far the most crowded platform I've performed on thus far, so I had to be extra brave today.

How much did you earn?

$16.14

Did anything unusual happen?

Yes. I captivated an audience for the first time, and it was amazing. There was a moment, I was feeling it, and so were they. I had a crowd of them standing around me just feeling the music and the words, and it was pure bliss. One woman looked like she was going to cry (and no, it wasn't me, haha).

I received an e-mail when I got home from a guy who saw me performing today. He said he is very sorry about my broken heart, and would like to take me out for dinner sometime. I am flattered, haha.

Did you meet anyone interesting?

Quite a few people actually! I have to take back my stereotypical notion that New Yorkers are rude because people have been really friendly. I had lots of people picking up cards today and inquiring about the project. Hopefully this means more stories! I had one woman let me know that I had competition at the other end of the platform, haha. There was one man who really touched my heart though. He walked over and said he honestly had no change, but if he did, he would give it to me. He seemed really upset about it. He told me I was amazing and he really wished he had something to give me. That truly meant more to me than the dollar would have. I had another visitor today! She was sweet enough to miss her train to take a video of me singing today's song.

What's the best advice you received from a stranger?

I didn't get any advice again today, but I got a lot of compliments and encouraging words from people. I am extremely grateful.

How are you feeling?

Great! I got a whole nine hours of sleep last night, and am finally figuring out a more concrete schedule for this job. I have a lot more faith in myself and this project now. Having the world's greatest support system (insert your name here) is certainly a huge part of that.

Listen to the full version of Cry

“I felt like a failure but I realized although the situation was messed up, having my daughter was meant to happen. I’m a better woman because of her. ”